Disbelief

I didn’t know what to think
Your room was filled with people
My heart only knew to sink
God called you to Heaven’s steeple

I can’t believe you’re gone
Though most of me is pleased
I feel somewhat withdrawn
But with Christ my heart is eased

You meant so much to me
I refused to see your pain
God chose to make you free
He knew how you suffered just thinking of the needle to your vein

I think of the last day I saw you
Your face and things you said
It was almost as if your soul knew
What God had in store for you just a few moments ahead

The doctor came out to explain
Just like on a TV show
He said they tried and tried again
But, God said it was time to go

I can’t believe I won’t see your smile
Or be able to hold your hand
I will be missing you all the while
Until I come home by God’s command

God calling you home shocked me
But I got to see you touched so many hearts
I thought for sure when I lost you I would flee
However, Christ showed me this is now where my true faith starts

It’s hard to wake up every day
Knowing you are no longer here
I can only rely on Jesus and pray
His answer was in your prayer book “Be of good cheer!”

I know you are alive and well and I trust in my Papa to carry me through this pain and I am so thankful that He loved you so much to take you away from all the evil that is to come here on Earth.  See you in God’s time. Your son Anthony

You Cannot Run!

I wanted to commit a sin
To try and cope with my loss
The struggle to overcome was deep within
I chose to look away from the cross

It left me feeling broken
And my grief just increased
My conviction was felt without a word spoken
The grace I experienced was from Jesus, our Most High Priest

I went to my room to lament
To ask for His healing touch
To trust in my faith and repent
Feeling like I was asking too much

Jesus comforted me quickly
Letting me feel His warm embrace
The breaths of deliverance exited thickly
As He poured onto me His Heavenly Grace

At the end of the night
I was free and understood my call
To stand strong in my Faith and Fight
To walk as a Man of God and not a slave who crawls

I bow only to the God of the Most High
Who has saved me from eternal death
Without Him I would surely die
Thankfully He breathed into me His last sacrificial breath

The grief I will have to feel
There is no way for it to be undone
This loss for me is so very real
However, from it I cannot run!

The Beauty of True Friendship

      I feel so numb to all that is around me. There are many days I choose to just be alone.  A lot of times it’s because I feel like I am a burden to my friends.  This lie is used throughout Satan’s land.  It is what it is, A LIE.  We are loved by our friends, and when they ask us to hang out it is not for pity or doing us a favor.  They choose to be with you because they love you and care about you.  When we listen to the lies that keep us from them it makes us miss out on opportunities to share how awesome Jesus really is.  Our relationship with Him is so transparent when we allow him to live through us.  I choose to surrender to Christ and I choose to say yes!  Don’t let lies allow you to be alone, know that God always provides a way out, and usually with someone who really cares about you.  Thank you to all my Friends who look out for me and care about me.  SELAH!