My Anxious Thoughts

God does so many wonderful things for me.  He is constantly in the works around my life.  Yet I seem to always find a way to doubt him.  When I should just be thankful for my next breath.  I made some big steps in my life that I have not done before and, I can tell you, the anxiety that is trying to wrap itself around my neck almost seems unbearable. For the true first time I am giving God this feeling and not allowing it to cut oxygen off to my brain so that my thoughts run free.  Something I learned in being vulnerable is that it sucks!!  However, I do believe on the positive side of it, the change in how I think is not relying on my maturity but in my weakness.  When I come to realize what is offered to me and through me the more I want and desire to trust God.  I just do not like to feel out of control!  I know that is something we are never completely in charge of but that is my delusional thinking, LOL.  Now I have done something that totally places it all in God’s hand and even took a step of acknowledgement in the matter.  There is a fear of rejection and of just plain fear.  Did I? Should I? Could I? When I? are the thoughts that typically bombard me and in all honestly I feel them wanted to drop bombs on me but Christ is there.  He has always been, I just have always been “In Control.”  My prayer I ask for you and me is that we would trust God regardless of how we feel and let him work in our lives to direct us and glorify him.  We should enjoy the fruits of the overflow and HE WILL GIVE YOU THE DESIRES OF OUR HEARTS! Claim that, Believe that because in the end, My Life is Not about Me,  it is about SERVING and SURRENDERING TO HIM!  Amen!!

One Love, One King, All Christ!

Jesus, I Am Yours and You Are Mine!

There has never been a time in my life where Jesus wasn’t mentioned.  Whether it was as a child by my mom or as an adult from people he placed in my path.  The constant message of his love was that I was HIS.  I can remember the moment I accepted him and then realized there was more to this than just saying the words, I wanted to know.  Mainly, I wanted to know that I truly was His.  The blessings of our life can come in so many ways and when you stop and look at life you realize that he is there for both the good and the bad.  It is how we lean on him that determines the outcome of our situations.  I love the saying “seeing is not believing, but Believing is seeing!”  WOW, those words sink to my heart because I am someone who always tried to handle it on my own.  I sit there and pray about it but already know the direction I am going to take.  Then out of the blue I get a message that says be patient when God is quiet, let him work and trust in his understanding of what you desire.  I love Jesus and want to be growing in deeper love with him every moment.  I encourage you, as I have, to sing praises to Jesus.  My voice is one only Jesus could love but I use it to its max singing,  “Jesus, I Am Yours and You Are Mine!!!”  over and over and over again.  The peace that transcends over my body and soul as I give him the glory is so satisfying and real.  Even to be weak in your Faith gives God a chance to be strong in your life.  He tells us Faith the size of a mustard seed can move Mountains… MOUNTAINS!!  Amen!!

One Love, One King, All Christ!

My Prayer Today

Papa,

Thank you for reaching down and lifting me up.  Thank you for removing that rock that was such a heavy burden for me to carry. All of my doubts and battles seemed so large because I tried to deal with life on my own.  The more I tried to do the more difficult it became.  I remembered what it was like to follow after you and I remember the footsteps poem.  I did not need you walking beside me I needed you to pick me up.  I realized that the 2 sets of footprints became one because of that and not because you were gone.  I lift up all the new things in my life and pursuits and pray you would open and close the doors that are in your will.  You know my heart and my desires, but also my anxious and unreasonable thoughts!!  I give it all to you and pray to continue to do right by letting you shine through me.  Thank you for embracing me in all my times of need even when I didn’t realize it or want it.  I pray against feeling numb like I have for my whole life and pray that I would take the steps into trusting those that you put in my life, knowing that it is you who gives me the discernment to trust them.  I pray that it would be in that trust of you I would be willing to be hurt by those you have put around me.  Papa, it feels good praying to you and knowing you are with me and I know you never left I just was being human.  I need you and you are my strength and my peace and I am thankful for all you do.  Everything in my life I surrender to you and I pray you take all of my anxious and unhealthy thoughts and bind them and send them wherever it is you send them.  I also pray that you would protect those in my crown of life and cover us all with the Blood of Christ.  It is in Jesus’ Holy and so Precious Name I pray.   AMEN!

One Love, One King, All Christ!