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Feb 17

Ya Got To Let It ALL Go!

When God is the teacher you better listen.  I am learning to do that skill a little better everyday.  However, some things take a few hours or even a day to sink in.  I know I am covered by Christ and that the Holy Spirit is guiding me in almost every area.  There was something that popped up when chatting with a friend of mine.  He asked a question and said it was placed on his mind a few times by God.  I was able to answer the question with conviction, but there was some doubt within.  It is amazing that as my mind is being renewed and my time is devoted to Christ I still attempt to deceive myself into keeping something I like.  Even though it isn’t a bad thing I am still holding onto the thought like it is mine.  This has to be surrendered and given to Christ it is the only way that I can completely say I am devoted to him fully.  There have been huge blessings and soul shattering changes in my life recently and I need to be mindful of these changes and look way deeper into each one.

Jesus has blessed me in so many ways, more than I will ever realize, but mainly because I am still here and living, even though, without him I probably wouldn’t be.  He has placed people in my life who are significant growers of my soul.  These types of relationships are vital to each of us, but more importantly we must get on our knees and lift up each one of those relationships and ask God to reveal its purpose.  This way we can stay peaceful as we learn it is in His Mighty Hands!  What I am learning is when I have hope in anything other than Christ that “anything” can become an idol, almost unknowingly.  A land mine waiting for me to step on because of my own selfishness.  When we see something or experience something good, our human nature automatically desires more of that good thing.  It can be dangerous, even as I am close to God, because you can fake the funk and make it seem he is blessing what “I want”, when in fact it just may be a blessing of paths crossed.

Jehovah Jireh is one of my favorite Hebrew sayings ” The Lord will provide” or ” The Lord will see to it.” We see this in the story of Abraham and the command from God to kill his son.  Let that hit your head, KILL HIS SON.  Abraham in all his feelings of not wanting to do this, surrendered, lifted his knife and was prepared to take his sons life.  He knew that God had provided for him and if this was what he wanted he would continue to provide.  You see God provided for Abraham what he thought was impossible so in his gratitude toward God he was committed to God.  He understood!  It was in his conviction and commitment to God that made him ready to carry out that task.  Thankfully, it was only a test and he did not have to take his sons life.  I am thankful my task is nothing like his, but it will be painful for me, but necessary.  The only way to live by saying Jehovah Jireh is through conviction and commitment to Christ.  There are things the Holy Spirit has placed on my heart that I have “my hope” in and not leaning on HIS Hope for me.  The hopes I have are not bad and are actually healthy one’s but they are about me and not God.  The reason it is so hard to let go of “my hope” is because honestly I have never had them and they are good.  This does resemble my battle with my sinful nature because it deals with self and not soul.  In order to move forward with my love affair with Christ at the center I must suffocate “my hopes” and desires and wait on Him to provide.  You see, my dear friends, He is the perfect one and that includes God’s timing.  However, with me being so new to this healthy way of thinking, it’s hard for me to see something So Good and it not be So Good! It is in that goodness that reveals to me my problem and forces me to be honest with myself.  I have to completely stop interfering with God’s plan and just follow! I gotta realize he doesn’t need any of my directions or suggestions!

I am ready to do this but not looking forward to the pain, but I am looking forward to how God will embrace me in this true surrender.  Hearing God’s voice is AWESOME and it was something I thought I would never be able to do but in my quiet time, as I was silent, He spoke the hard truths.  The main focus and beauty of this is even in the hard truths, and the pain I know is to come, and the questions of ” are you sure, God?” No sin or temptation has come near.  PRAISE BE TO GOD!  I just wanted to make sure and share this battle as this is a good one.  This is not good vs evil, but a conviction of my soul renewed to complete a covenant made between me and the Lord.  I must follow his terms of this contract and stop trying to add my own clauses to it.  Pray for me that God would prepare me to do this well.  JEHOVAH JIREH! Yes He Does! My Faith is in him and no longer “my hopes!” Amen

One Love, One King, All Christ!

Feb 13

The Truth In The Light

John 1:5 (NIV)

5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome[a] it.

The past 2 months have been such a transforming time for my soul.  God has truly placed his hands upon me and has guided the Holy Spirit in molding me.  I have read the above verse probably a thousand times and never understood it until now.  What we consider as impossible, to God is very much possible.  When we battle our inner demons we feel defeated.  We continually say I can’t stop this or worse we just accept it as who we are and lose the battles the rest of our lives.  God recently revealed to me in prayer that the majority of the pleasure I have experienced in my life has been to avoid pain.  HOW CRAZY IS THAT?  I haven’t been able to enjoy many of the small victories in life because I always look to find what is wrong with me.  Today is a different day and God is revealing so much and for this I am thankful, especially thankful for deliverance.

When God says and talks about the word being light, He is talking about our Savior, Jesus.  Every moment with Jesus in the New Testament shows Jesus making the darkness run away and healing those who came close.  Healing is what we all desire in life because of the wounds we experience.  We have scars, but many of those have not healed well and are just scabbed over and easy to bleed again.  We desire healing, but God calls for us to scar up not smooth up.  Our scars remind us of where God has been with us and that he doesn’t leave.  As I watch the rerun of my life to this point I see how influenced my life has been by my pain.  Now, I can see who I am in Christ I am excited to see how the rest of life will pan out with God leading and me following.

I am currently at a place in my life that I thought I would never be able to reach with God.  A place of Surrender where I can hear God clearly.  Where he is constantly speaking peace to my heart and placing a calming hand on my thoughts.  I am now gaining wisdom on his terms and not mine, a prayer I prayed many mango seasons ago.  The light of Christ is now covering me, no longer the darkness I use to feel comfort in.  I can feel that the grave clothes have been removed, they have fallen off and the warmth of my Heavenly Father’s embrace is overwhelming.  I have learned that the grave clothes fall off the body but don’t completely detach.  We drag them behind us, enough so that we walk with a slight limp.  That is a reminder to not become complacent in Christ and remember the enemy(Satan) is lurking like a HUNGRY STARVING BIG TOOTHED ROTTED GUMMED LION!  The more I follow and stay in the light the further away the darkness and grave clothes feel.  It doesn’t have an impact on my decisions or thoughts but I still need to know it is there and my healing needs to be intentional.  By giving God my full surrender and waiting on his transcending peace and not on “What I want” or worse ” What I THINK is best” for me I am experiencing worship in a deeper and more meaningful way.  I cannot believe how much God has changed me in these past few weeks.  I can only imagine what years of progress of living in Christ will be like.  My dear, dear Friends, God can fix you, you can stop and most importantly HE LOVES YOU! Amen

One Love, One King, All Christ!

Jan 28

Crumbling!

When you think of crumbling you may think of cookies or cake. Also, you could think of mountains, buildings or even an avalanche.  For me its the movie “Bruce Almighty” when he has the tag line ” And that’s the way the cookie crumbles!” This is how my heart is starting to feel in a good way and with my thoughts.  I can feel the old crumbling off of me.  Moment by moment my heart softens.  This crumbling is a process and as each piece falls I can stop to take a look at it from God’s eyes.  What do I mean?  Well, I have prayed many times for God to open the eyes of my heart and in that answered prayer I can see my broken pieces.  I have been able to observe my thinking and feelings from a different perspective.  As Jesus has helped me take these thoughts captive, he dissects each one and shows me how I have been fooled.  Our over confidence and arrogance does not come from Christ.  It is our humility that draws His omnipotent power into us.

Crumbling is a humbling action because regardless of how put together something or someone may seem to be there is always a crumbling point.  However, when God is in our life he will not allow us to just be destroyed.  His love for us is overflowing.  He works on every piece before it crumbles, keeping the good and rejecting the bad.  Once we have surrendered to Jesus, he then takes all the good pieces and puts them to His all eternal flame.  That fire brings all the good of you together and then we are placed back into the Potter’s Hand, Christ.  We still must remember to surrender and take up our cross daily.  When we remain in the Potter’s hands it is so much easier for Jesus to wipe away and smooth out the cracks that still may try and break us.  We must be patient with the crumbling and know that God’s timing is perfect.  The crumbling in my life has taught me to realize any thought I have outside of Jesus is something I should not pursue and give to him.  I slow down now when one of “those” thoughts come, YOU KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT, and realize they have swayed my actions for a long, long, long time.  Now as Jesus molds me and I am safe in his hands, I can feel my heart soften and my brain circuits being untangled.  Finally, God’s Love is FOR ME! ( And that’s the way the cookie crumbles!) Amen

One Love, One King, All Christ!

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