I was able to share God’s word today and in that word he spoke about coming after him.  What I realized in that was we simply just need to have the desire within us to want to come after him.  It is at that point that he comes to us.  We get so confused thinking that God is so far away and how could he love someone like me, but the truth is He does the coming after.  He desires our lives and he wants us to know him intimately.  He is able to let us know that following him is not easy.  People will look at you differently, because the choices we make are not of the World.  They do not make sense to those around us, including sometimes our Christian brothers and sisters.  This is where our Faith comes in and we have to trust that the peace we feel about him is more than enough of an answer.  He says that if anyone would come after me he must deny himself and take up his cross daily.  This means we have to turn away from whats familiar.  We have to turn away from the things or the people that lead us astray.  Denying our self is a very hard thing to do, because we are taking way the things we feel we need in our life.  However, when you stop and look at those things, you realize they have only caused you heartache and spiritual death, over and over.  He calls for us to take up our cross and that simply means let people see you are broken too.  Once someone can see the real you and they can know that they are not alone in the struggle, it gives them a sense of freedom and comfort to know they are not alone.  So in the simple words of God saying to Come after him, we learn that in turn it means He already had chosen us.  You are his beloved, my friends, and believe me, He has a plan set for you and like the bible says it is a plan to prosper you and protect you.  Let God come after you!! Amen!!

One of my weaknesses in following Christ is I never settle down long enough to really listen to what he has to say.  I will assume many things and run with those, but rarely do I just sit in the silence of my thoughts and let God speak to me.  I need to set aside time for him, just like I do for my friends and family.  Sadly, set aside time like I do for the television.  It is so ridiculously easy for me to sit and watch TV but when it comes time to listen, I don’t.  Well God has constantly spoken to me over the years and when we run from hearing his still and soft voice, he will get the message to you through people.  He never stops pursuing us and in that we should have peace in knowing that He is a good father and King.  He cares for us and simply desires to spend time with us.  I sat last night on the balcony, it was a beautiful night and I found myself reminiscing about the past.  It was in that moment of those memories I needed to stop and just let God talk to me, He did.  As I sat there looking at the stars, my thoughts were running a millions miles per second, but as I started to focus on Christ I felt a settling down in my soul.  He let me know that in His time all my desires shall come to true and I need to continue to persevere, however, I also need to continue to takes steps of Faith and put myself into His hands and trust and not my own.  You see when we go on our trust we always tend to turn away from those areas of our life that are uncomfortable to deal in. However, when we simply surrender and say Lord I am willing to look foolish for you and trust you then whatever we do our lives will affect others hearts.  Ultimately, the disciples did not live for themselves they knew they were loved by Jesus, they always took the time to listen and they stayed obedient to His voice.  My hearts desire is to not follow my feelings anymore, but follow the truth I learn in Christ.  I want my life to show wisdom and not just be someone who has knowledge of Jesus.  I am learning to listen and I no longer want to sabotage the life that Christ is setting before me.